Growing up to be me: A poem by Gomathi Mohan

Every time my giggles were silenced - "they didn't behove of a girl",

I grew up to hate myself, within a shell I began to curl,

Every time they showed impatience - my words cut short, 

I grew up not knowing, whether to speak up or not.

Every time I was conditioned by society's patrons with their regulation,

I grew up to chain my free spirit, subject to manipulation.

Every time my desires were pronounced boldly,

I grew up to lock them in, as I was thought of lowly.

Every time I questioned  actions and unjust ways,

I grew up to know people don't mean, what he or she says. 

Every time a headline flashed,  of a girl - fatalistic,

I grew up to understand I may be,  just another statistic. 

Every time they wiped off my dreams and stomped upon,

I grew up with my will to live them all, dawn after dawn;

Every time they told growing up comprised of compromise,

I grew up promising to never, to stay and watch the sunrise,

Every time they became a little less kind,

I grew up wiser, stronger - to love and live, a gentle reminder.

Every time they pulled the carpet from under my feet to fall,

Learned to get up, rise again.. And grow few more inches tall.

After all, I was too young to be an adult acting up,

Shouldering this thought learned to unlearn, enough of growing up.

All the while that child in me, struggling to regain, 

Then came along my daughter.  And I grew up with her into that little girl again!